So far (even though I love my job) this year I feel like I'm at war. The constant stress of being understaffed and treated as though I can do the job of three or four different people some days feels like it will do me in. They have finally hired people. Maybe enough people to stop the madness for some of us (or me, I can handle working two places in the clinic, just not three at one time). I'm not sure though. I had one trainee quit in the middle of her second day. I took it very personally and very badly.
The first girl that was trained is very unhappy. She got trained "on the job" but in the midst of the chaos that is to be her job, while I was working as well. The following trainees are getting two days completely devoted to training and then are being thrust in front off all the clients to meet demands as they can.
I was trained in the first manner, and it served me well. I am hoping the second works for our new recruits. I have one more to train on Monday and Tuesday and then I am off with my lovely Penny for 4 days! I can't wait!!! I am already past the point of feeling like if one person asks me to be responsible for or to do one more thing that I might just lay down in the floor and scream until I pass out.
The only peace I can summon comes when I craft. This does NOT lead to good quality time with Penny and I feel like she has been the gathering place for my stress and grumpiness because I've heard my named yelled over and over and over and over again with different orders behind it. Sometimes you just snap and that's NEVER the right answer at work. One day this week I made some remarks to my sweet and lovable Penny that no spouse should make.
I'm lucky she understands, and forgives. It's not me. It's the PTSD version that is near to collapse. They won't ask me to work throught time they have given me as off, of that I am assured so the vacation is mine. I can't wait to feel like a lady again myself instead of this wrung out shell of a person who has had so much taken, they have hardly anything to give. I have several new outfits to wear thanks to a 5.00 sale "rack" at Torrid online. AND these are clothes that didn't even button when I ordered them but look great now. I do miss you all and thank you for being understanding about the fact that life happens.
Hugs!
